24 posts tagged “neil strauss”

(continued from part 1)

There was about a couple of times that I did the
peacocking. I did that to see if it worked because I heard
that other guys were doing it.

I felt ridiculous when I went out and was totally
incongruent with my personality.

But we all know that women pay attention to fashion, and
like a well-dressed man.

I noticed that it was in my workout clothes or something
really basic - like jeans and a tanktop that some of my best
pickups occurred.

At the same time, I'd see muscled-up guys wearing revealing
spandex, or super-tight shirts at the club, and women
definitely did not respond well to this.

It got me thinking... that maybe it's not how flashy or
costly are the cloths should be.

I guess there is something else going on.

Actually, there are two things going on, and you must
manage, or balance these two things.

First and foremost, never seek approval from women. If a
woman can tell that you are trying to impress her or make
her like you, you are toast.

So if you look like you got dressed with the intention of
getting women's attention, they'll see you coming a mile a
way and put up their defenses.

You shouldn't have to look like a pick up artist.

It's better to dress reasonably, and not put too much
thought into it.

However, you don't want to look sloppy. You want to present
yourself in the best way you can.

This gets back to self-expression.

You already have a sense what kind of man you are, what
your "scene" is, what you think is cool.

Do not change that.

Instead, develop it, with these simple tweaks.

Wear colors that suites to your skin tone and hair color.
This isn't rocket science. You can look online or go to n
upscale men's clothing store, and ask someone about this.

Next, make sure your clothes are clean, and wrinkle free,
and reasonably up-to-date.  A woman should not have to worry
about bringing you around her friends.

Lastly, make sure your clothes fit well, meaning, they
ACCENTUATE YOUR MASCULINE PHYSIQUE.

Wear shirts that narrow your waist, and square your
shoulders.

Have your legs look long and thin by wearing pants.

Wear shoes that make your feet look big and well-formed.

Groom yourself - nose, neck, and ear hairs. Get a decent
haircut. Shave, or don't, but figure out what looks best and
take it all the way.

One other thing...

Accessories should hang off you loosely, and have the look
of a small decoration that says, "yeah, I can fuck."

I don't want to talk too much because that's a whole other
topic because that's a whole other topic. Just use your
intuition with this one.

I am NOT the most fashion savvy guy in the world.

Usually the one who pick out clothes for me is my
girlfriend - not for MY benefits...

... but so that she doesn't feel embarrassed when we go out
in public together!

If it were up to me, I'd wear sweats and a t-shirt all day,
with some old worn out sneakers. I mean, I think fashion is
pretty silly.

I can absolutely appreciate the aspect of design and style
of fashion. When I looked at the able-bodied dressed woman,
her outfits is like of art, and I dig that.

But when a man is "too stylish" I kinda lose respect for
him.

Don't misinterpret me, a man should present himself like he
means to be taken seriously. A nice suit, good quality,
well-fitting clothes are a basic of being a masculine.

But some guys take it too far.

Case in point, the obsession with "peacocking" in the
pickup Community for the past several years.

When I hear this term it makes me cringe.

YOU ARE NOT A PEACOCK.

If you don't know what "peacocking" is, let me explain it
to you.

A while ago, there was an emergence of routine-based
"game," relying heavily on superficial techniques, status
games, and over-analysis of social interactions.

This always gone in the opposite direction and I never saw
the value of it.

Major reason is I saw how pretending to be someone other
than yourself, and it JUST FELT WRONG saying the routines
and joke that the other guys came up with.

On top of that, the FIRST FOCUS of all that strategy and
game-playing was to eventually get approval from women,
while making them feel insecure so they'd think you were
cooler than them.

Think about the layers in the dating approach. Not only are
you faking your personality because you

a) seek approval (as if women has an authority on what
makes man a man)

b) keep the fact that you're seeking approval

c) play games with women so that they feel insecure and try
to seek your approval

YUCK

One of the main techniques of this approach was to
"peacock," to dress up in a really loud, ostentatious way so
that women would "notice" you and want to talk to you.

Wearing a nice watch, or a necklace isn't a bad thing
because some have personal meaning.

I don't want women to like me because of that.

I'm sure a lot of you guys have seen the advocates of this
approach on TV shows, straining to make sense out of this
hare-brained "technique."

It's sad to say that some students of other pickup schools
that I've encountered,  were not only nervous, misdirected,
clumsy, they looked RETARDED.

So I'd like to set a record when it comes to fashion and
meeting girls.

There are few pieces of things you need to pay attention to
when it comes to your physical looks.

After you get this stuff handled, you should put it out of
your mind, and not wait for women to notice you before you
TAKE ACTION.

Before I go on, I have to reveal a secret.

(Continued in Part 2)

Have you been in situation when you were ask by the girl you are dating if you are reliable, honest or had a good relationship with your family?

- Or -

Have you been in a situation where she talked about how she LOVED when her boyfriend did something very specific?

Do you remember feeling motivated to answer in a way to impress her or perhaps do the same exact thing ?

Of course... we've all been there. What's important however is not what the outcome was in those situations, but only to be AWARE of the fact that you were EMOTIONALLY COMPELLED to behave in a certain way...

So today I'd like to introduce to you a concept called SHAPING.

Whether a woman knew it or not (most likely, she didn't) she was shaping you.

Now don't get me wrong, this isn't necessarily a bad thing... People do it to each other all the time.

But most of the time, you are encouraging a woman to behave in a way that is not aligned with your desired outcome.

And that's what we want to change STARTING RIGHT NOW.

Shaping includes a number of tools that are used to set a strong precedent of behavior in a woman.

There are a number of different ways you can start to employ shaping in your interactions with women.

And I've split them up into 5 different categories.

This would be  a huge topic, and I could literally teach an entire seminar on shaping alone.

But for this moment I just want to get the seeds planted in your mind so that you can begin to grasp the higher level ideas, and start to incorporate them into your interactions.

So to start with let's look at the five different concept of shaping.

1. Screening questions.

Screening questions are by far the least subtle and most overt out of all the shaping techniques.

Screening questions are questions specifically made to:

A) Get a woman to answer a specific way and
B) Start to behave in a manner more congruent with how she just answered you.

There are many types of screening questions, and above all you should use them in the right context.

For example, you wouldn't start a conversation with a woman with the question "Do you consider yourself to be independent?"... but it might come later on.

They are easiest to employ right away, but because they cause a sharp emotional response, they may seem transparent and obvious to the woman.

2. Showing that you value certain behaviors or personality traits.

This is very similar to screening questions, except this time you are making a statement.

It's a little less obvious, but it is no where near as subtle as the remaining 3 techniques.

Instead of saying something like "What was the most spontaneous thing you've ever done?" (which is a screening question) You might change it to something like this "Spontaneity is really important to me. It not only keeps things fresh and exciting, but also reminds me of our incredible freedom in life."

Because you are justifying your statement with a truism (it's hard to argue that spontaneity keeps things fresh and exciting), she cannot disagree and will be motivated to agree that spontaneity is important.

And because she's committed to saying spontaneity is important, she will now behave in a way consistent with that.

3. Setting a strong precedent through storytelling.

This concept, along with the next two, are very devious.

They are so devious, in fact, that women use them ALL THE TIME.

It's funny actually - my sister recently sat in on a recent DiClassified Drills workshop in NYC and I was surprised to discover that she not only agreed with the effectiveness of my techniques, but also - had already used many of them NATURALLY!

Of course this makes sense, seeing that many of my BEST techniques have been stolen DIRECTLY from the women I know who have the VERY BEST game.

The idea behind this 3rd concept is that you will tell a story that DEMONSTRATES what standards you expect, so that she can live up to them.

For example, you could say to a girl, very early in the interaction something like:

"One thing that is great about my friend Sarah, is that she is extremely thoughtful. Last night I mentioned that I was thinking of going shopping for a few new shirts, and not two hours later she dropped off this month's copy of GQ magazine on her way to the gym. Only problem now is, I have TOO MANY new ideas for a new outfit."

The beauty of that is, it doesn't even have to be true!

(I'm not going to make a moral decision for you here, I'm sure that you're more than capable. But for the record, these techniques have the exact same effect on a woman whether they are true or not)

4. Pointing out a desired personality trait while neglecting the undesirable.

This is classic shaping, and can be used freely to amplify existing behaviors and personality traits.

The idea is that - if you see a woman doing something (for example drinking like CRAZY while out in a bar) you can comment on this in the following way.

Taking this single behavior - drinking like crazy, there are different components to it, some good, some bad.

Let's say you like the free-spirited aspect of  it, but you don't like the fact that she may not have a lot of self control...

You could say:

"Wow, you're so much fun! and so-free spirited. It's cool you do things you really want to do, and don't rely on others for direction. You follow your OWN desires."

By pointing out behaviors, you are in fact REWARDING them and AMPLIFYING that same behavior
in the future.

By selecting the ASPECT of her behaviors you like, and calling attention to them, you are SHAPING her future behavior.

(By the way, the above example is useful when going for a same-night-lay with a woman. You tell her she makes her own decisions and she'll be less likely to listen to her friends when they suggest that she shouldn't go home with you. Sneaky, but also KILLER in the field)

5. Reward calibration

For instance, giving a woman cues as to how to perceive you based on the nature of the way you reward her 'good' behavior. This is highly advanced, and I am far beyond the scope of this newsletter.

Just understand that if you have determined what you will acknowledge as "good" behavior from a girl, it is to your benefit to reward her with something you want her to work for or chase after.

Hint: It should be either physicality or getting to sex, affection, but NEVER material or monetary. Violating this rule is the surest way to create a girl as a gold digger!

(YES. Gold diggers are not born gold diggers. They are CREATED on a case by case basis by the men in their lives. See a woman as a gold digger, and that my friend, is what she will be.)

So be be good and use these concept with care.

Does your a woman know that the vibe you're showing to her is the real you?

Or does your woman know that after she sleeps with you all of what you said will be backed up?

Credibility is the answer to these.

There are lots of guys think that they don't have enough value, 90% of it, it's credibility they lack. In fact, most of the tactics used to create value these days only serves to make a nasty woman-repelling player vibe. (and anyone who's anyone KNOWS I don't even teach value. Not for a damn second!)

"Player vibe" is not actually a bad vibe, but a mistake in building and maintaining credibility.

Able to create credibility is one of the key components to sleeping with a girl quickly.

Another component is sexual tension.

And as a pick-up student, you know that there are women that needs sexual tension to sleep with a guy and the other half need credibility first. (You do know that, right?)

There are three levels of credibility.

1. Safety

2. Commonality

3. Direction

Safety: The basic and fundamental level of credibility in which you need to demonstrate SAFETY before a woman will be spending a night and sleep with you.

Commonality: You need to demonstrate commonality in order for a woman to continue sleeping with you, or having a continued affair with you.

Direction: You need to show direction in order that a woman will change her existing life plans or to leave her current boyfriend and be with you.

A WORD ABOUT SOCIAL PROGRAMMING ->

We have to realize that every person we meet is socially programmed in a different way. Even you yourself have have your own social programming. We all do.

These differences is not necessarily a bad thing. On the other hand, it's very useful in our dealing with women.

Realize that although we understand a lot of a woman's behaviors come from her social programming, we can't expect her to realize that.

Men have instinct to try to sleep with as many women as possible, women have evolved an instinct to choose guys who gives a high chance of sticking around to raise children.

And this instinct is reinforced by social programming.

Woman's programming is her reality and literally her world.

And the credibility is about showing you understand her world.

HERE'S AN EXAMPLE ->

You are comfortably warm sitting in a chair inside your bedroom.

And then a friend of you came in. And he said he was cold and wanted to turn up the heat. Then he told you he liked to sit on where you were sitting in. And asked if he could urinate in the corner of your room.

You would probably feel mad with him. You might even think he's insane.

He's showing you that he's not seeing the same reality as you. He's "in his own world".

Because he has shown you that he doesn't understand and  respect your world - you probably wouldn't connect with him, or feel like giving him compliance.

And this is how women feel when you don't demonstrate credibility.

If a woman thinks that it's a wrong thing for a guy to kiss and tell (and most women do) -> You should show her you ALSO a believe that it's not good for a guy to kiss and tell.

And you can get really good at this.

The fact that you have the same perceptions about the world as her will build your credibility vastly.

Try the three levels of credibility in this way:

Safety - It's safe to have you in her world.

Commonality - See the same things in your woman's world. Having same perceptions, values, and goals.

Direction - You have the ability to modify and change her world.

These are best demonstrated in order.

At first, guys are usually good at meeting a certain kind of woman.

It's because guys naturally understands a certain type of woman's worldview.

But as you get good, you'll start to be able to match ANY woman's worldview.

The best way of doing this is by anticipating her thoughts and verbalizing her feelings or views about the world, as if they are your own.

At first remember the things she said in the past, and then recall it after she has forgotten what she said.

Then you will get good at pacing her reality and leading. Eventually it gets to the point where you can intuitively understand her reality. Then she will trust you to change it for her. You enter your woman's world, and then start teaching her new things about HER world.

That's when you know you get this thing.

When someone comes along who understands a woman's reality so well, she doesn't just think he's perceptive and skilled, she just feels a connection.

She will thinks "He's just like me!"

This is really the easiest thing in the world. Yet so many people mess it up.

Just when I know how to escalate and get good with women quickly, I think of those women I slept with but couldn't keep around.

And it's quite sad.

So many women had the potential to be great girlfriends.

But I had my brain up my butt.

...maybe that's a little rude.

But this comes down from TWO distinct problems:

First, I was trying to prove something to myself. I was still a recovering nerd. And I've never fully recovered. But I've stopped trying to recover. And that's what's made me move past this "proving myself" thing.

I just accepted who I am.

Sure, I like comic books and video games.

But...

Do you believe girls have cooler interests?

Is getting drunk, Myspace and shopping is cooler than what I'm into?

It's all have connection.

What it really need is self-acceptance.

If you don't accept yourself, women won't accept you also.

Can you imagine a woman wanting to be your girlfriend when you don't like yourself?

She will HATE your company and not want to be around you.

Because you can't really like a woman,  if you don't like yourself.  And if you do like her, but not yourself, then you look like a total loser. And who do you think wants to date a loser?

It may sound easy, but self-acceptance is hard to do. How many times have you hear these from people "I don't care what anyone thinks of me!"

Based on my experience, almost all DON'T ACCEPT themselves completely.

And I'm no exception.

The degree to which you accept yourself is the degree to which women find you attractive, and people want to be around you.

It may be hard to completely accept yourself. There is an old beliefs creep in and saying you are not enough, that you must be more than yourself now.

The degree to which your game becomes better is if you know the degree to which you stop these thoughts.

Because the real game is about yourself and not doubting about yourself. And the game doesn't end after your opener, after a few dates, after "making love." It never ends that way.

Because it is you.

You are not separated from your game.

Your game IS YOU. The "game" is the degree to which you can express who you really are.

"But I'm nervous and insecure and awkward" you might be thinking. I disagree. That's not you.

That is the vague you.

That's you trying to come out, but your old mental habits and ego stop you in expressing what you really want to express.

Before I get too deep into that, I want to move on to the second reason why I couldn't keep women around after I slept with them.

I am not aware of shaping.

Knowing what you want is really just an extension of self-acceptance. And shaping is all about knowing what YOU want. If you don't know what you want, you can't shape.

In fact, what applied to others is self-acceptance. You know what you like, and you encourage girls to be that for you.

You see, women are very flexible. They have many sides that they can reveal to a man. Men usually implicitly tell women to be selfish, mean, and act like they are better than the man.

But it's not the woman's fault. She's just doing what she's told. Women are always looking to men to get a sense of reality.

So if you come to a woman and treat her like she's on a pedestal, she will act accordingly.

If you talked and treat a woman like she's lucky you approached her, she'll feel that way.

Same through after mating, if you treat her like she should stay in your life and nurture your lifestyle, she will do so.

We go into this heavily in our workshops. I've developed lots of ways to shape a woman to be EXACTLY the kind of woman I want in my life.

And each woman is different. For example, I may want one woman to be just a mating partner. I may want another woman to be a sugar mama! I may want another one to be a girlfriend.  It all depends on what you want.

I think of all the crappy, frustrating relationships I used to have.

And how frustrating it was to not see those women again using all the hookups I had as a young pickup artist.

But when I began to accept myself and analyze what I wanted, it all came together.

The Attraction Code is a about figuring out who you are, accepting and cultivating your character, and then applying that to the women you want to meet, date, and sleep with.

The Attraction Code is a MUST HAVE if you are struggling with self acceptance and letting the real YOU shine.

Dating can be your best friend.

...OR your big enemy.

A lot of time, a man can feel like a slave to his natural need to procreate.

Then there goes a common quote,  "He thinks with his... You know."

Well it can be hard to NOT think that way if you aren't physically satisfied.

But men are also goal oriented.

We make our actions to achieve things and influence the world in a positive way.

I've personally faced one of the biggest challenges and it is balancing the two - my carnal obsession and achieving my goals.

When you are single, dating can consume a lot of time. Women will suck away at your time if you don't know what you're doing.

Before you know it, you are spending hours in the park, feeding the birds and cuddling...now there's nothing wrong with spending quality time with your girlfriend, AS LONG AS YOU DON'T compromise YOUR GOALS IN LIFE.

Goals take time, likewise to women.

In fact, it's a woman's NATURE to get the man's time - it's her way of getting you to invest in her. If she gets pregnant there's a lesser chance of you leaving her (this comes from our caveman days, so to speak).

It is really tricky to manage your time with women. You see, most men want to give their time to women. By nature men are "givers." They like to please women, protect them, and give them good feelings.

Guys have also a urges that can completely take over your thinking.

Both of these things can get in the way of you making the most of your life, your time.

I want you take a moment and ask this to yourself, "WHAT DO I REALLY WANT TO GIVE TO WOMEN?"

Now I know it wasn't about "money," or "control over my life," or "lots of my free time."

It was probably something like "good feelings, sexual pleasure, relaxation, excitement, feeling of safety, make her smile or feel good about herself, etc."

I think men have problems with how they use their time with women in two ways.

First, they think that the gifts they REALLY want to give aren't that valuable, so they overcompensate with other stuff - like spending too much time or money on a woman.

Second, men think that they are "getting" something valuable when a girl spends time with them.

Guys was brainwash by the society to believe that women are a prize to attain, and that there's some inherent value in a pretty face.

It's not TRUE!

The best thing is to see women for what they are, nothing more, nothing less. They are cute, sometimes fun, but ultimately not that important, AND THEY CAN'T COMPLETE YOUR LIFE!

Now it is really hard to break out of this mental prison of feeling inferior to women.

Your mental habits are subtle and hard to notice because you've been doing them for years.

Young men are taught that their urges  is crude and silly, and that it is just a favor that women ALLOWS them to mate with them.

There's a syndrome that I call a "doofus dad" syndromeThere's another societal factor going on, . In almost every TV commercial and sitcom, the "dad" or "boyfriend" or "husband" is a dopey, incompetent goof, and the mom/daughter/girlfriend/wife has to use her superior intelligence to fix the situation.

This leads to the perception that women are "better," and thus, their time is more valuable than yours.

If your time is not so valuable, then you will feel obligated to give her LOTS OF IT.

But here's the thing - you won't be present for most of that time, if you are giving a woman too much time. You will be distracted, resentful, you will give her your "half-assed" attention.

I just realize this after analyzing lots of dates I went on women.

After that I started to give my FULL ATTENTION to women even though I'm only giving a smaller amounts of my time.

Aside from making our time better, this creates a VAST ATTRACTION because I left women craving more.

Now my girlfriends can't get enough of me - in fact, I don't GIVE THEM "enough."

Ask you know, "enough" would mean, "overexposure" to me, and women can't be pulled to what they already have.

The proper way to manage your time is by being HONEST. And I don't recommend you to play games with women and pretend to be busy or whatever.

No need of games, just be real with the girl - and don't spend more time that you want.

Enjoy whatever free time you have with women but still with focus on your personal goals. Be the man on the go.

Now in a short amount of time it requires that you are able to meet a lot of women, which I'll have to cover in another newsletter.

It's not good to see that men waste their lives chasing and "putting up with" girls, and then they are left out ALONE.

Remember that women aren't property that you can keep or somehow bring with you when you die.

It doesn't mean that you can "keep" the women if you invest all your time with her.

One more thing here - if you start being honest with the amount of time you are willing give to a woman, you may feel GUILTY.

It's either a girl will try to make you feel guilty, or you will feel it on your own. This is ok, it just means you have a weak focus.

If you are following your true ways, it will usually from the social norm.

If you are in the habit of adopting the values that others try to impose onto you, you will probably experience some tension, guilt, discomfort, even loneliness at first.

That's why I set and develop the Attraction Code. It's all about self-control, finding true path, and letting the real 'you' emerge from within.

And there's no need for us to impose our goals onto you. Given the proper guidance, I know you are able to do that for yourself.

Vin

If you are interested in meeting, attracting and keeping a 10, then I think you'll find this letter very interesting.

But first off, let go waaay back...

When I was in high school, there was this girl in my class who was perfect.

She was intelligent, cool, and so beautiful that it was hard to look at her (and yet I couldn't stop my eyes looking)...

She was friendly to everyone and was one of the popular kids in school.

We talked occasionally, and looking back I realize we were flirting (I was too stupid to realize at the time).

I wanted to ask her to senior prom so badly...but I chickened out at the last minute.

It was a few years later that I realized that the girl had a crushed on me all the senior year.

I've talked to a lot of guys and this experience seems pretty common, there was this ONE SPECIAL GIRL who you crushed on from afar, or you missed an opportunity with her, or she broke your heart...

Ah, the unreachable "10," a perfect woman that every men dream but seems hard to attain.

I have a lot to say about the concept of "10's," In deeper sense they are another "breed" of women, but it is on the way they think that makes them so.

Understanding the reality of the extremely beautiful women and understanding your own fascination for a perfect women will help you resolve this conundrum, and might even help you in finding your "perfect girl."

First of all, the concept of a "10" is a myth. There is no such thing as a perfect human being. No woman is more "valuable" just because she looks nicer than other women.

The woman that is perfect for you is the one who can turns you on and have a great chemistry with you. That is the only true "10".

Following this reasoning, the world is full of 10's, given you have the skills to meet a lot of women and create options for yourself.

Treating a woman differently than other women just because she is prettier is a recipe for failure.

Why?

Because almost all men do that.

The girl knows what you are about and she sees you as a shallow guy.

But there definitely are certain women that seem on another "level" of beauty than the rest. These women get treated much differently than other women.

You need to understand on how you will deal with these kinds of women.

Like I said, you shouldn't treat them "differently."

Let me clarify.

You shouldn't treat a woman BETTER than the other women. But there are things that you need to know.

First, she is sick of guys chasing her for her looks alone.

She wants to be appreciated for her personality more than anything else.

Now for your own sake I'm going to give you a heads up.

There are two types of "10's."

Low self-esteem and high self-esteem.

The pretty common is the low self-esteem 10's. Women here have a guilt complex. Because they are used to being wanted for their looks, but they know that they didn't EARN that attention.

In fact, most of their lives are probably coasted, and are in complete dumbasses.

It may sounds not good  but I call it like it is.

These type of women will respond to jerk-behavior. Taking away their validation will make them flip out and do anything to get it back.

Anything.

(Aside from that, these women usually suck in bed and are total head cases when you get involved with them.)

Meanwhile, the high self-esteem 10's are women that have had a taste of the elite - early from the start they realized that high levels of society were attainable to them, they exert an effort be intelligent, successful and make the most of their lives.

These women know that they are just a little closer to a great life than everyone else, and so they are motivated to put in the extra effort.

Usually HSE 10's are intellegent, have good attitudes, have a direction in life and have lots of interests beyond being clubbing.

Actually, most of beautiful women I've dated didn't even go to the club. They like to spend their evenings being with their families, reading, or having a nice dinner with friends (or studying if they were in college).

And here's another interesting thing. These women are single for long periods of time while in-between boyfriends. Why?

It is because they have high standards for themselves, and this makes most men either too intimidated to ask them out, or act too needy and pathetic around them, it's rare that they meet another man who is on their level.

But here's the good news. These women are the easiest to attract when you understand The Attraction Code.

The Attraction Code is about being the best man you can be, being a "male 10."

You will notice an interesting thing if you start to apply the Attraction Code.

You'll get odd responses from less attractive women - they will occasionally be rude to you because they know they're not on your level - it's what I call the Auto-Rejection Mechanism. Some women will try to protect themselves from being rejected by you, by rejecting YOU first.

But the most attractive, cool women will respond much differently...you'll be amazed to see the most beautiful women warm right up to you as soon as you approach - whether on the street or in the bar - because they can see that you are on their "level."

She thinks to herself, "finally, a guy who can hang with me; he's confident and treats me like a real person. And he's the only guy who's actually tried to talk to me today, instead of whistling from his car."

The Attraction Code is meant for these kinds of women. Of course you'll also enjoy plenty of "adventures" with all kinds of women, but ultimately this is about having the option of dating the hottest, highest quality women.

There are bunch of 10's out there waiting for you.

Don't spend another year missing something that you could've been enjoying right now.

Vin

One of the mistakes that some guys commits when they first meet a girl is to show that they understand the GAME. Like, they'll  start talking about evolution, alpha males, how girls will always cheat on their boyfriends, how they know girls are more intimate guys and blah blah.

I will refer to this kind of act as nonsense as "The Talk of Death".

As a pick-up guru this kind of things will make your conversation topics very poor with women. Especially hot ones.

It might work with the social anthropologist grad student, but to the girl that any man in his right mind would be attracted to, there are a few major things wrong with this strategy:

(BTW - if you happen to find a girl that loves this kind of stuff, by all means go on with it, I'm just saying it should not be used as an ATTRACTION techniques for most of the female population)

1. It puts her on the defensive. It's exactly like one country revealing it's battle plans to another country that it is at war with.

It shows that you are "thinking too much" about the dynamic, which not only is a huge turn off, but also makes her think you're going to be a mind-trip. Not good.

2. There are chances that her awareness level is about 10% of yours.

Especially if you're keeping up on my newsletters which is called "Stepped Awareness".

Have you ever tried played a song you LOVED for a friend and they just didn't get it?  

It's because their awareness didn't go through the same process that yours had - and resulted in you really liking the song...

What would expect to a girl who spends the majority of her time thinking about new shoes,  jewelries and her problems with her boss, wouldn't you think it's just too alien and weird for her when you talk about "the unique mating patters of the bonobo apes and how it relates to girls in the club".

This is the same reason why you'll sometimes see the biggest AFC ever with a smoking hot girl. He's normal, and she can easily introduce him to her friends without being ashamed!

3. To a girl that DOES understand it; you talking about it make it seem like a big deal, when it should be plainly obvious.

5-10% of women actually DO get this stuff. It's obvious, intuitive and accepted for them.

These women are capable of open relationships and tend to also like women, and generally a lot of fun.

But here's the thing - the guys they end up dating ALSO get this stuff intuitively.

And when you get something intuitively, you'll never go out of your way to convince another person of it, or explain it like it's some huge revelation!

So the moment you do it, the women who are most eligible for the lifestyle you're looking for, will instantly disqualify you.

So... What to do instead?

Well - one of the most powerful techniques I use is this:

**Understand society's programming, understand her specific programming, and appear to be under the exact same programming.**

Once you try these techniques,  you're absolutely see a big difference in your game.

Keep your knowledge of REALITY to yourself (and of course, if you figure out anything amazing, I would appreciate it if you share it on my forum as well)